Tuesday, November 20, 2012

Jake Luhrs Testimony

This is Jake Luhrs, lead vocalist of August Burns Red, and this is his testimony. I was really inspired by it and found it relatable somehow. God is so amazing and can change lives. It's wonderful.

Just be faithful

"never live by feelings, just be faithful."  That's what My pastor's wife said her dad always used to tell her. it's really good advice but for me it's really hard.  We're supposed to live only by God's will. I've been learning about that. And that means basically not paying attention to what I want and what I feel but only God's, and that's what is best for me.
And I mean, look at Jesus!  He humbled Himself so much and came here for us. To teach us, to be a servant, to DIE!  DO you think He really really WANTED all that pain and non luxury?  (I mean yes because He is God and He wanted to save us and help us) But He was paying attention to what the Father had in store for Him and what He had to do. FOR OTHERS.  It's very not based on feelings and how one wants to do something. I know for sure I don't always, and don't much live that way, and I need to.  Obedience to God and persevering through trials is what will strengthen my faith and grow me. Obedience is what we are commanded to practice and that basically means dieing to self and living in Christ alone.  That's hard, but amazing.
The minuet I decided to give it a try and surrender to God - to ask Him for His direction, to give me His will, take mine and give me a whole haerted love for Him - I felt better. Stress was lifted. Life was a little easier. A smile has been on my face and I have time to focus on other people instead of only freaking out.  It's a long process and every detail of life isn't insta-fixed, but God is the key - Jesus is the bread of life.  Experiance has shown His word to be true and Hid promisses fulfilled. he is a gracious and beautiful Father. It is more than ever imagined - even on earth my Savior never seces to leave me aw struck and on my knees. 

Tuesday, November 6, 2012

Remember



If I am a Christian, than why do I

Sit in my sin and tell myself filthy lies

If I say I am saved

Then why do I keep running to be enslaved

And why am I not mindful of your tears?!

For me…. For it’s worse than your fears.

 

God, why do I push on past?

Why do I wish to make my death last?

I hear your voice and I stare at your eyes,

But in the end I am still allowing your cries…

And I’m lost again; oh I’m running away again,

When will I remember when I wanted this to end…

 

 

If I really loved you like I said

Then why do I allow this to go on in my head

If I say that I’m yours

Than why do I lock myself behind closed doors

And why am I sick in corrupted heart!?

For me… I am worse than I was in the start.

 

God, why do I push on past?

Why do I wish to make my death last?

I hear your voice and I stare at your eyes,

But in the end I am still allowing your cries…

And I’m lost again; oh I’m running away again,

When will I remember when I wanted this to end…

 

And it all started with the end

The memories of the past start to blend

Together forever, that’s what I said,

But did I really mean it, inside this poor head!?

 

Am I really that blind!?

Am I really that lost inside…

 

I hear your voice and I stare at your eyes,

But in the end I am still allowing your cries…

And I’m lost again; oh I’m running away again,

When will I remember when I wanted this to end…

Sunday, November 4, 2012

Dear, Summer

To be honest, what am I doing?
Has it gone this far before I realized,
That the words that i'm using
Are corrupted by my poor eyes...
And now my heart, and then,my soul..
Oh please tell me.. what was the goal?

Because I go on and on
Doing what I do, but never questioning if it's wrong,
But I say it's right!

And the air pressure is tight,
In my head!
How long have I gone on..after my heart bled..

Am I doing what I want,
Because if I am, then why do I feel horrible inside?
In my mind, the images haunt,
Because I don't want this, but it's here even though I've tried...
And forever I've wondered what I'll be when i'm old,
But this is not... The dream I sold...

Because I go on and on
Doing what I do, but never questioning if it's wrong,
But I say it's right!
And the air pressure is tight,
In my head!
How long have I gone on..after my heart bled..

Good boys, I've never been that one
But my excuse is, I think there might be none...
I create a scenario when I'm ok,
But to be honest I don't know if I can live like this one more day...

Oh heart has it been this long..
Until I realized what I did was wrong...

Thursday, November 1, 2012

Dear, Winter


Lost inside the white inside the face

It’s like the roses filled your cheeks, before you came and froze all this life

It’s like the moon and stars were placed in your eyes

A smile almost chills all of this place

And your hands, oh sweet winter time

Please, come put them safe in mine.

 

Guiding all the happiness in and out of my coat

I am not one to, but now I have to boast

Of all the joy the cool breeze brings around me

Without you, oh what would I ever be?

 

Take off my gloves and feel my hands freeze

This great time you’ve brought, is all that I can see

Your appearance is blinding at this sweet season timing

Come back, come back, and share more seasons with me.

 

Your hair the misty winds with that sweet smelling scent

Even beauty is here when the sky collects your cries

Calming peace, can be found in your snow eyes

I’m lost in this reverie, the only day dream that I meant

And your arms, oh sweet winter time

Please, let me wrap you mine.

 

Guiding all the happiness in and out of my coat

I am not one to, but now I have to boast

Of all the joy the cool breeze brings around me

Without you, oh what would I ever be?

 

Take off my gloves and feel my hands freeze

This great time you’ve brought, is all that I can see

Your appearance is blinding at this sweet season timing

Come back, come back, and share more seasons with me.

 

Don’t forget me, when you leave me,

And don’t lose the heart, that you take when you leave me,

Just remember to visit at least once a year

And each and every day I will wait for you to re-appear

 

Your appearance is blinding at this sweet season timing

Come back, come back and share more seasons with me,

Come back, please come back, and share just one more season with me

Sunday, October 28, 2012

let it go, let it go


Sit alone, and cry it out

I know how it feels, I have sat in a dark corner.

My heart breaks over the thoughts that pain became pleasure

I know how it feels, I have loved the feeling of that which kills me.

My knees break, I no longer can stand

But you must, you must, stop sitting, it’s only closer to sleeping

 

But you hurt and I see the struggle you have felt

I know you made a mistake and the scars show, but I love you

Even if you’re as bloody as a murdered man,

I will still hold you close and kiss your hand.

My God doesn’t abandon, and he takes far beyond where I can

So pursue Him instead of me, for what love can I make for eternity?

 

What words can I find, sought out to show you

Words are formally used to bless, but for you some have used for curse

I know how it is to be that one that none look at

But I know that even when I am in the darkest hour

And the clock strikes twelve

I know something is holding me in my shadows

 

Two eyes that shine through black veils

Under the hidden secrets upon your wrists

And bring you back to the life that will keep you

Hold fast to understanding, hold fast to these hands

 

But you hurt and I see the struggle you have felt

I know you made a mistake and the scars show, but I love you

Even if you’re as bloody as a murdered man,

I will still hold you close and kiss your hand.

My God doesn’t abandon, and he takes far beyond where I can

So pursue Him instead of me, for what love can I make for eternity?

 

Why do tears hurt and give comfort

Why do my words want to cry, but my eyes don’t

I know how it is to turn to the dark for a light

But don’t fall for the trick

Stay your ground

 

Fear a place that is perfect

If it is perfect it only means your mind has changed

 

I know, I know

Smile and shed that sadness that grips your heart

Drop the distraught, drop what’s in your hands

Let it go, that’s what you need.

 

Saturday, October 27, 2012

Winter

I took a heart, when I was young
I didn't know, what to become
Look past me now and love me
(love me)

You always walked, I always told
I never spoke it, now I want you to know
to
look past the winter that I never became
but was
somewhere deep, inside of me

(like spring comes)
Come for me
(like spring does)
murder me

Kill me-
the winter I am
murder me, murder me
never again
will I
walk
the earth like this

I never knew I never, saw this haunting
"I never asked" says I, pleading, taunting
give me what I really want
patch my wholes
These winter lies, lye in blackened souls

Slay it-
cold in my skin
whatever spirit
(murder, murder)
won't haunt me again
In this life I'll, live absent
(of    this   cold)

I took a look through a looking glass
I don't know whats, coming next
stapled fists - my dissonance
look me up and loosen this


I never knew I never, saw this dawning
I never knew it would. now it's got me
give me what I need to want
patch my wholes
These winter lies, lye in blackened souls


Get me light, get me piety
shred my self - security
affable is what I'm not
-
I'm disease
I'm deceased
I'm just grief
I'll just cheat
Forlorn, despondency
Just     fix      me

I never knew I never, saw this coming
I never asked, I never wanted haunting
give me what I really want
give me what I need

Kill this-
the winter scene
murder me, murder me
never I've been
so wanting
never to see walking
this part of me

(this part of me)

(this part of me)

Based on the Sermon a While Back

I don't sin and turn a sinner,
I don't lie and make a liar,
I'm a sinner so I sin,
Am but a liar so I lie.

Born, I saw this world,
I began this life I knew,
And one, first veiled to my eyes,
As a spirit started too.

I lived and learned to walk in one,
But, dead, I rot the other,
From the very first I was,
Born live, but dead and under.

As a rotting corps is just
As dead as one just gone,
A murder man and sweet young girl,
Are both still dead in sin.

"Born again" - a common phrase,
It's never seen till seen in grace,
A new life that moves them both,
I now command: initiate.

Friday, October 19, 2012

It's been a while

Well it's been a while since the least time I said anything, well here is what's been on my head recently You know, it isn't always easy for me My parents are not living together anymore, they were missionaries, but nowadays they barely go to church at all (I'm not saying that going to church is the only way to be a Christian). I'm always struggling with problems that I have mostly in my faith and with temptations. It's hard to love others. It's not so easy to constantly want to talk to God. But to be honest.. You know that stuff is easy for me to get back on my feet when I fall, even though it's a constant battle What has really been killing me recently is being away from the ones I love. It's hard to live with my mom all the time, but never see my dad, I love my dad It's hard to be away from my friends here in Florida, because they are always doing t hings, but I'm too far to attend. But I seriously just lay here in my bed with my heart just seeking, and with my mind unable to find peace thinking of my two very best friends Jim and Elizabeth. It's one of the hardest things for me, to be away from them... And they are always on my mind. But you know I can overcome this all. To be honest with no cliche, God really just bring me peace and can help always. Opening his word, praying, and living him and just obeying him brings me peace beyond possible thinking. It's a crazy thing in life, but it's true God's the one thing that keeps me going even though I'm still sad over missing the ones I love. Never forget that He is right beside you, always.

Sunday, September 9, 2012

The nails in your hands

Well i was thinking yesterday and realized that i killed Jesus it was my sin. i mean i know he had died for me and realized it was my sin he died for. But if i wasn't such a loser he wouldn't have had to die so i came up with this little thing i don't know what it is it doesn't rhyme but its for God.

I put you on the cross
Put you in the grave
And all you did was save me
I put the nails in your hands
Put the nails in your feet
And all you did was ask God for my forgiveness
Why do I deserve all your Love.

Tuesday, August 21, 2012

So much foir that idea


I don’t feel like being an artist right now.  It gets kind of bagged on anyway.  I wouldn’t call it a profession at all. It’s what people do when, one, they can, and two, they can’t really do anything else. Sure… Expression.  Who really cares?  Suck it up and live on! We don’t need to be artistic or express ourselves!  Be a man.  Personally, I think it is sort of a waste of time and is overdramatized. Not only that, but it also seems to spit drama from its cry-baby, emotional mouth.  

I like it…. I love it.  …but it’s dumb.  I feel stupid trying to pursue a life full of it.

I’d be like, an “artisan.” Eh…  Throughout the things I’ve learned in history class I’ve always seen artisans as expendable and sort of as hold backs.  I don’t know why, because they are the people who develop technology, which isn’t holding anything back, but then again, I’m kind of mad at technology too. 

Artists are weird.

I’m really mad.

I just wanna… I want to be… Something. Not here, not now, not this. Somewhere.

I miss.  . . .

Ugh . . . I don’t know.

Wednesday, August 15, 2012

I know that I don't deserve it.


Here I am once again Lord

Falling and Slipping into temptation once again

Oh how I wished it would end

Oh how I wish I would end

God take me and make me into something new

Take me and make me just like you



God I’m not worthy to even speak of your name

God I’m so filthy, I know you know that I am

How could I sit right by you and stay the same

How can you deal with me and all that I do

I’m a sick pile of dirt that never knew you

I’m the one that called a lie the truth



I don’t deserve any of this care

I’m as evil as murderers, as perverse as a whore

I don’t want to be like this, but my flesh carries me on

I sin and I sin, but all you do is love me more

God I’m in tears for now I see,

Not only does it hurt you, it kills me.



God I’m not worthy to even speak of your name

God I’m so filthy, I know you know that I am

How could I sit right by you and stay the same

How can you deal with me and all that I do

I’m a sick pile of dirt that never knew you

I’m the one that called a lie the truth



But God I plead, that you just take me, take me back to home

Just bring me, to the place where I belong,

Into your arms, into your arms

Where I will never be let go

Into your arms, into your arms

Where I will be wrapped with love, even when I make mistakes

You never let me go…

Thursday, August 2, 2012

If I Die

I don't know what came over me but i just started singing this so i thought i would write it out its just kind of the chorus but yeah.....

If I were to die
there would be no tear
If i were to leave
there would be no despair
If i were to go
you would never care


Friday, July 6, 2012

L A Z Z Z Y. . .

She wants to deny it. . .

 "No harm is done!" She pleads, innocent with her mouth, but drenched in guilt underneath.

It is true, thing's could be worse, but harm has been done by this absence of action.
Dear girl, let me tell you a story:

Suppose there is a man who hires a first gardener, and to him he says "Gardener, go and garden my large yard. Yes, there are thorns, there is dirt, you will have to lift things, pull things, and dig things,  - no one said it was a piece of cake - but this is what I hired you for.  If you do this, I will be pleased, and you will be rewarded."

So, the first gardener went out and destroyed the man's yard, burning what was already there and adding thorns and weeds that weren't there before.  When the first gardener went to the man to receive his pay, he said "Sir, I really want my reward!" but, the man, obviously, did not give it to him. Instead he said "Gardener, if you truly wanted it, you would have acted accordingly."

After the man fired the first gardener and when his yard was restored to normal, he hired a second gardener. To the second gardener he said the same: "Gardener, go and garden my large yard. Yes, there are thorns, there is dirt, you will have to lift things, pull things, and dig things, - no one said it was a piece of cake - but this is what I hired you for.  If you do this, I will be pleased, and you will be rewarded."
The second gardener went away, and, not wanting the thorns, the dirt, or the work and sweat, he merely sat around. When he went to the man to receive his pay, like the first, it wasn't given to him.

"...but, Sir!" the second gardener pleaded, "I wasn't like the first! No harm was done, and I really want my reward!"

The second gardener was mistaken. Harm was done. True, he did not burn anything down, but in not watering or trimming he let the man's yard turn into it's own kind of disaster.

The man said to the second gardener as he said to the first: "Gardener, if you truly wanted it, you would have acted accordingly."

The man hired yet another gardener, a third saying to him "Gardener, go and garden my large yard. Yes, there are thorns, there is dirt, you will have to lift things, pull things, and dig things, - no one said it was a piece of cake - but this is what I hired you for.  If you do this, I will be pleased, and you will be rewarded."

The third gardener did just what the man requested and tended the garden, pulling things out where they didn't belong and putting things in where they did. At the end of his hard work the third gardener went to receive his pay from the man, and the man rewarded him saying "Well done. You have done what I have asked and now receive blessings."



You, girl, hiding from what you've always known is true, can probably figure out which gardener you are most like. Nothing can be something when it's not where it belongs.

Persevere? Be strong! Get back out there! Quit doing nothing and do what you know is right!

"But for something like that I would need... more confidence," She says, starting a list that she will never finish and turning uncomfortably as if looking for an escape or a way to justify her careless lifestyle.

What you need, dear girl, is a confidence that is this: being sure of what you know is true, what you do, and who you do it for.  You don't even need to be sure of who you are!  That will come in the package. ... You do, however, - and seeming as if you've forgotten or pushed it aside, you need to  now more than ever -  know WHAT you are.

Know what you are, get to know the one you work for a little better, reestablish what you're out here for... Are you doing this whole "life" thing for yourself or who? Confidence will come with that, and hopefully the strength to do a little better. With that will come progress, and the right progress with the right heart will bring reward in a variety of shapes and sizes.

Excuses won't get you anywhere, but we both know who will.

How unworthy do you feel, after this realization, to be offered such an opportunity?
Probably as bad as me. . . ?


(The girl isn't some real person. I'm not being mean. This is somthing I thought about a lot today. writen in an odd way, I admit...  it could have been better.  But you can't deny that the inicial target was a thought provocer.  Think long and hard, friends... long and hard.)

Thursday, July 5, 2012

A few thoughts

In life we keep pushing things till tomorrow. We almost always say "yeah I'll do it later", but is later always promised. Millions and millions of people die each day, are all of them saved? How can we as Christians sit back and watch the fireworks and say "well, I can tell my friend about God later", what if your friend isn't there later? We keep waiting until everything goes our way. If we kept on sitting waiting for everything to be exactly perfect, we could be sitting here for a long time. 

One of the worst things people can say is "you're too young". People set an age limit on who can do great things, and who can't, but does God? We need to stop waiting until we are all older and work with the chances that God gives us to let him shine through us. 

Another thing; we get so caught up in church, that we forget about what it's all about. We go to church and we work on making sure that the time fits perfectly and that everything flows smoothly, but when it comes to helping other people and having a real relationship with God, we blow it and forget about it all. Sadly the pastors get caught up in preaching a good sermon, but don't take time to really help the broken man. Why do Christians preach of love, but when it comes down to it, sometimes they just preach but show no actions?

I wish we could all just change for the better...

Tuesday, June 26, 2012

Tragic American Life

  
            America has been ok but it's the judgement I'm afraid I'll get when I go to school. I'm a tom-boy/ slash girl but I love to get messy and weird! A couple days ago i stepped in mud and a girl was like "Ugh! That is so GROSS! You should get it clean!" And I was like in my head, it's mud. God made dirt, dirt won't hurt! If only she grew up in Africa she would understand! I mean it's not my fault she was stuck in the middle of the World of Plastic! Whatever...
  
              I'm a nerd and I'm proud to call myself one. I'm actually not afraid of what people think. Here in America I get along better with boys 'cause I like video games and comic books and what not. I always try to get into a conversation with a girl about those things but all they care about is make-up and boys. It's so frustrating! One girl was saying she was trying to read Lord of the Rings. and I got into this whole talk about it. A "talk" with myself. She just sat there and looked at me. I know this one girl who is a math wiz and she is in my grade. Then the horrible question came along when I was talking to her. "Well, I like Star Wars, Lord of the Rings, Batman, Hunger Games, X-Men, and so on..." She looked at me and nodded an smile awkwardly.
      
            Anyways, I'm not your average teenage American girl. I'm different and God made me that way. I hope I can find someone as great as you Liz who understands me.
                                                
                                                  I found this quote that applies to this kinda:
            If I'm weird around you,
           It's because I'm comfortable.

~Amber

Monday, June 11, 2012

Touch my brother and I'll break you

This is a little song about how I would stand up for my brother.


You can beat on me and push me around
But if you touch my brother, you’ll be gone before you can hear the sound
This is my last hope, my last wish
You take that away and I’ll make sure you never lived

Try me, but don’t you dare try him
That’s the last mistake you could ever make
We might fight, but he’s my last hope, my last wish
This is my family, you break it, I break you

Come; pick your hands up from your sides
This is the last thing I would ever let slide
Come on; pick those hands up from your sides
Try and run away, I’d like to see you try

I pick him up from the ground
You hurt him and of that you’re proud
Come here; let’s see how tough you are.
Let’s see your pride, when you’re on your knees

Come; pick your hands up from your sides
This is the last thing I would ever let slide
Come on; pick those hands up from your sides
Try and run away, I’d like to see you try


Fear this, because I fear it too
You’ll wish you would have, when I’m done with you
Fear this, because I fear it too
You’ll wish you would have, when I’m done with you

Monday, June 4, 2012

Brother, Be Young

This isn't about me. It's about a girl I know. Poor thing. She is pretty bummed out about life right now. I wrote this poem based on her and from her perspective.
__________________________________________________________



my dear brother, I love and I miss
he doesn't think when he acts, and it hits like a fist

Mother, dear Mother, it's SO unfair
you give me these rules, but let him dye his hair?!

I want him to change, I wish he'd be kind
he's ruined his life, and with that ruined mine

I miss our young days, when we played and were friends
does he think of me now? do those days have an end?

I love him so much, but he's dieing inside
I want him to love me, but he wants to hide


__________________________________________________________

Even though what's going on with her has nothing to do with me, I feel like I have the same feelings as her right now, and I am truly sad with her today. To anyone like me who might have a friend that is really depressed, my advice is plain and simply to point them to Jesus. Sometimes, though, they just need someone to listen.  Just give them an ear - just listen. Let them yell at you. Who else do they have to yell at and get their feelings out to? That is what friends are for.   :)  And Jesus is our best friend. We can always talk to Him as well.


Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.


Colossians 3:15 NIV
Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful.





Thursday, May 31, 2012

My Analogy of Life

Life: We are all vampires craving blood. We look everywhere for it, from under our beds to the end of the rainbow. Sometimes we find what seems to be the real thing, but it's all trash. It's satisfying, but only until it reaches our stomachs, and our stomachs cry "What the heck?! This isn't gonna cut it!"

At the end of the day we return to our houses, disappointed the we just can't seem to find what we want in life. But the next day it's past the shelf in the kitchen and out the door again for another search. The ironic thing is that on that kitchen shelf is a bottomless container of the exact blood we look for day to day. How it can become so overlooked and replaced by garbage is beyond me. It contains the ONLY thing that will satisfy us forever, but we go out believing we will find the same satisfaction at the dump.

Think about it.

Wednesday, May 9, 2012

My birthday

So about a week ago it was my 16th birthday. Yeah i was kinda excited but i was also really bummed for some reason. I don't know why but this was probably the worst birthday i had the best part though was some of my friends threw me a surprise birthday and it was really fun and nice. But then that really was it, I don't know why but i have been bummed all the time. I don't have any motivation to do anything except play soccer and no one here really cares about sports so it doesn't matter. It seems that i just have really no place in the group of friends here in Malawi anymore. So i am sixteen now and it just keeps getting worse. I have no idea what i should do anymore.

Sunday, April 1, 2012

Tears

If I lost you what would I do.
But I don't understand, how could you?
How could you leave me when I really needed you?
I don't know if I can honestly say that your friendship is true...
And now you've hurt me, I'm falling apart...
And I cry as the blood pours...
From my heart...

And I cry all my tears out.
Why did you? You were all I cared about,
But now you wont even speak to me...
When I cry, it's as if I bleed...

I don't get it, I don't understand
If you needed some space, I'm more than the man
to give it to you, cuz I just wanted you to know that I love you.
But now that you threw it away how can I say that you're true...
And now that you've stabbed me, I'm falling apart...
And I cry as the blood spreads....
From my heart....

And I cry all my tears out.
Why did you? You were all I cared about,
But now you wont even speak to me...
When I cry, it's as if I bleed...

I thought you would be here forever for me
But you left and it hurt me deep.
I've never ever considered jumping,
But sadly you're the one who made these thoughts keep running...
And now that you've destroyed me, I'm falling apart...
And I cry as the blood pours...
From my heart...

And I cry all my tears out.
Why did you? You were all I cared about,
But now you wont even speak to me...
When I cry, it's as if I bleed...

But I shall not give up...
Not for you though, you've done enough.

Wednesday, March 14, 2012

The Way it Goes

So I live in Africa and there used to be a ton of people who lived here and loved it. but guess what, all those people are gone or coming soon. I am really bummed about that. There is no one here really who is really excited about it except me. i have lived here for 13 years and never have gotten bored of it. I have lived in America for 3 years and only one of those years i remember, and I loved it for about the first week than was longing to come back to Malawi. But i get back and everyone is suddenly gone. I am really sad but i also have joy because God is here for me. He is the only one I can trust and he loves me no matter what I do and I love Him. I am now just sitting around getting fat and lazy but it has also been the best times in my life, but also the worst. And it just got worse because everyone is gone. But its life and thats just the way it goes.

Thursday, March 8, 2012

What truth is.

I was writing a  paper about what truth is and I think this might be helpful or maybe you think I'm wrong, either way I really want to hear what you think about this, hope you enjoy.


What is Truth?
                What is truth? I am most definitely a Christian so I will give you the obvious answer, Jesus. Jesus declares that he is the truth. How is truth to be determined, now that is a question. There have been many arguments concerning what is true. Some people argue that if it is not in the Bible, than it is not true, but that is not the truth. Mathematics was not in the Bible, but we can prove that it is true. But some things we can’t prove are true by just trial and answer, so where do we get the answers? Most people get it from what they call their own truth, but if you made it up, than how can it be true without being verified to something. Some people use evolution to verify what is true, but if evolution its self is nothing more than what someone else made up to be their own truth, than how can we say that it is true. As a Christian I verify everything to the word of God, the Bible. I know that the Bible is true; it has been proven true and cannot be proven wrong by anything that is right. It is physically impossible to prove God’s word wrong. Some people get it wrong with that statement too. Just because you heard it in church doesn’t mean that it was God’s word. Some things said in church are just the pastor’s thoughts added to a matter, and if it does not fully line up with scripture than it can be proven wrong. But humans have been trying to prove the word wrong for a while and still they have no evidence saying that it is false in any way. The only way people try to prove it wrong is by making false accusations against it and twisting words. So when I evaluate what is true, I refer to the Bible. If it contradicts what God’s word says, than it really is not true, since God’s word is true. The way I see it is not that if it isn’t in the Bible it’s completely false, but that if it contradicts the Bible than it cannot be true. If someone told me that a banana was red, I cannot base my answer off of the Bible, because The Bible never talks about the color of a banana. So in order to find out I would have to search for all the bananas and make sure none of them were naturally red to prove him wrong. If something can be prove without having any missing gaps where the persons own theory comes in, than I can believe it is true. But once you get to the point where you ask questions that we cannot verify I refer to the Bible, such as who or what created the earth. The Bible simply states that God did, but others throw in what they believe with little facts to back it up, yet tons of people listen to what they have to say and not what God does (and what the person is saying is less accurate than the Bible). Some people think that it is crazy that people base their life off of a book, but it is not just a book, it is the most historically correct and most truthful book in the world, while others are just basing it off of some logical thinking and a lot of what they want it to be. It’s kind like me standing up in front of people and saying that all apples have the same exact size, shape, and  depth of color because I happened to find two apples that proved that, but still that is only two apples, the rest of our theory is what we made up to make it fit into our heads. How are Christians the ones who get called crazy, when a lot of people are just like someone claiming that all apples are exactly the same based off of tiny little facts. Some people are even crazier and believe that whatever they say is true, is the legitimate truth. So if I walked outside and said that the world was completely purple and had arms and legs, than according to that faith I’m right. Sadly many, many people fall into believing things that aren’t true and get lost in all of the commotion and forget what is really true, God. In conclusion God is really the only truth there is. I don’t mean to be harsh, but God is the truth and if you don’t believe that than sadly you’re living in a lie. That is what I know is true and how I think truth should be evaluated.

Tuesday, March 6, 2012

Not Ever Knowing

Hi my name is Caleb  (this is really the first time I have ever blogged so if its bad sorry)
I have been an MK my whole life in total i have spent 3 years out of Malawi, and only one of those i remember and it was this last year. I went to a "Christian" school but no one was really a Christian there. It was really hard because i never knew if the person i was talking to was a real christian or just said they were. It was one of the hardest years of my life because i spent that whole year not ever knowing who was a christian. It really confused me about what to believe about what was good and what was bad. But i was lucky that i had some really great friends and they helped clear some of that up. I am not trying to say that all america is like that but it was just a bummer of an experience with people. everything other than that was really great and i loved it. Then i moved back to Malawi and it is a really clear difference in right and wrong its like two separate groups of people. But it is really sad cause here are a lot of people who hang out with the wrong group who are really good people but are just confused with the right. I feel like i am being pulled into a gap in the middle where no one really likes me its just they hang out with me she they are bored. I don't know what to do, and the friends that i feel really liked me just got p and left real fast and its been bumming me out.

Saturday, March 3, 2012

Friends

  If there is one thing in life that I learned it has to be that friends are so important. If there is one thing that I would change is how I treat my friends, or at least one of my friends. You see her and I had a weird relationship. We used to like each other but then we just hated each other, or so it seemed. She used to be like my best friend until I ruined our friendship. I remember the day I messed up so badly. It was her birthday and I was just so angry, I couldn't take it anymore. She had hurt me deeply and kept hurting me some how, but still I had no right to do what I did. On her birthday, her BIRTHDAY, I wrote her the meanest letter I have ever writen to anyone ever before. I told her that she was two faced and that she was so wishy washy and just was a terrible person. I ruined it for her... and I can't change that. Even nowadays, now that we are friends again, it's still hard to not make mistakes. I do get hurt by her, but I don't ever want to hurt her. Ahhh I don't even know what I'm saying. I guess I'm just really trying to say a few things, number one: Don't ruin your good friend's birthday. Number two: If you have a friend treat them with the respect they diserve, because you never know when you wont have them anymore. And number three: To my good friend out there (you know who you are) I am so sorry for everything I do and have done, I really want to talk to you, like you asked, and I'm sorry for just being a jerk on your birthday, I wont on this one.

Thursday, March 1, 2012

Some times life can kill, but we have to live.

  You know sometimes life really can kill and I really just feel like giving up when it tries to. I don't know what you are going through, but my life is going pretty bad. I moved to Africa and had a wonderfull time with my great friends, but I'll never forget the day that everything went wrong. I woke up to play some video games with my little brother and was just counting down the days until my best friends, the trumbles, would come back from there trip from South Africa. It started off good until my parents woke up. My dad ran out angrily and came to me and my brother. He sat nect to us for a little while until my mom came out of her room crying. My dad told us that my mom had been cheating on him and was in love with another man and that he, my dad, was going to leave us and probably send me and johnmark back to america to live there. I have never cried more in my life that day and I'm not one to cry. I made a promise with my little brother that no matter what, I would love and stay with him and be there for him. Well eventually my mom, my dad, my brother and I all had to leave, I didn't even get to say one last goodbye to my best friends. I went right from Africa back into American culture. For the first 2 weeks I was literally thinking about killing myself. I had no will to live anymore, to me no one understood anything. I was really really close to trying to kill myself too. Now my dad lives in my grandparents' house and my mom lives in our house. But I no longer want to kill myself. I realized that really no matter what God is really there. That whole week I had my pastors and my christian friends just come and help me, without me even telling them anything. My pastor suggested that I start to take some christian classes and help out in the youth services and go to his cell group, and litterally the day that I did so I felt more peace than you can ever imagine. Maybe your life is as bad as mine or maybe worse or maybe less, but God is the only one who can really fix and heal the gap in your heart. If you let him he can do great things in you. Now I have a passion like none other to reach out for christ and to give all I have for him. It still hurts to have my parents living in 2 different houses, but I pray and believe that no matter what happens that His will be done. Don't give up even if life tries to kill, just keep living, no matter what.
T.J

Sunday, February 26, 2012

I'm not a missionary kid, but I still love Jesus!

     Hello! My name is Sophia, and I am NOT a missionary kid. Though I am not a missionary kid, I still love the Lord. I have actually never been out of the United States, to minister at least. I go to a Christian school, and I have Christian friends – but bad choices still present themselves. And I still give in. Each and everyday I find myself finding the joy that the Lord has given to me. While im not a missionary, I still do the Lords “mission work”. At my school there are people who come in hating the Lord, and I try my best to show them how wonderful Christ is. 

    A few short months ago, in walked a girl, who seemed troubled. I started to talk to her, and she told me everything wrong in her life – it seemed pretty bad. But I had to remind her that Jesus loves everyone, and forgives every sin. A few weeks passed, and I then asked her how she liked school her response was “it is the worst school I have ever been to, and I hate how everyone is always talking about this God”. In all honesty, I was shocked! I started to ease her into the idea of Christ, and now she is a Christian! Here is the verse that changed her mind “And whenever you stand praying, if you have anything against anyone, forgive him and let it drop (leave it, let it go), in order that your Father Who is in heaven may also forgive you your [own] failings and shortcomings and let them drop. Mark 11:25


Sophia
    
     

Welcome to the wonderfull world of weekends and too much cake

I don't really know what to write about right now that has to do with faith and what not. Lately I've found that what I say only wrecks things. I don't know what to say about God anymore, and frankly I don't know exactly how to think of Him. I'm a little lost about everything becuase it seems like diferent people tell me diferent things, and I don't know what God is trying to tell me.  Maybe He isn't trying to tell me anything right now. 

I have learned a cupple things tonight though.  One was that God totaly dominates witch doctor birds. Aparently we heard one. Sarah wouldn't tell me what a witch doctor bird is, but I'm not sure I wanted to know. I got freaked anyway, so me and Jericho prayed and I felt alot better. Another thing I learned was that teenagers, no matter what, I think go looking for awkward conversations about "likeing" people and what not. It's really weird to tell you the truth. Even though I am that way too, I think it's not so good and veryy weird.  The last thing I learned was that music REALLY afects my mood.  Screemo definitly calms me down and makes me feel like I've unlocked the door to my real mind, but it also makes me feel like I'm in a deeper world that is a bit sad. It also always makes me think of Timmy, and makes me miss him.  On the other hand, Ryan plugs in his iPOd and plays ska and I feel compleatly diferent. Happy I guess, but a happy that has no where to go and nothing to think about or do. 

Our suprise party for Ryan went well tonight. I had alot of fun. I'm really thankfull for my friends and I'm also really thankfull to have guy friedns as well. My mom told me she didn't really talk to guys untill 9th grade but I guess in Malawi when there are not that many people to be friends with it just happens that you talk to boys.

Well... I'm tired. It's 1:00 and I'm so tired.  I guess I will go to bed soon. 
Jesus loves you ;P 
-liz