Thursday, March 1, 2012

Some times life can kill, but we have to live.

  You know sometimes life really can kill and I really just feel like giving up when it tries to. I don't know what you are going through, but my life is going pretty bad. I moved to Africa and had a wonderfull time with my great friends, but I'll never forget the day that everything went wrong. I woke up to play some video games with my little brother and was just counting down the days until my best friends, the trumbles, would come back from there trip from South Africa. It started off good until my parents woke up. My dad ran out angrily and came to me and my brother. He sat nect to us for a little while until my mom came out of her room crying. My dad told us that my mom had been cheating on him and was in love with another man and that he, my dad, was going to leave us and probably send me and johnmark back to america to live there. I have never cried more in my life that day and I'm not one to cry. I made a promise with my little brother that no matter what, I would love and stay with him and be there for him. Well eventually my mom, my dad, my brother and I all had to leave, I didn't even get to say one last goodbye to my best friends. I went right from Africa back into American culture. For the first 2 weeks I was literally thinking about killing myself. I had no will to live anymore, to me no one understood anything. I was really really close to trying to kill myself too. Now my dad lives in my grandparents' house and my mom lives in our house. But I no longer want to kill myself. I realized that really no matter what God is really there. That whole week I had my pastors and my christian friends just come and help me, without me even telling them anything. My pastor suggested that I start to take some christian classes and help out in the youth services and go to his cell group, and litterally the day that I did so I felt more peace than you can ever imagine. Maybe your life is as bad as mine or maybe worse or maybe less, but God is the only one who can really fix and heal the gap in your heart. If you let him he can do great things in you. Now I have a passion like none other to reach out for christ and to give all I have for him. It still hurts to have my parents living in 2 different houses, but I pray and believe that no matter what happens that His will be done. Don't give up even if life tries to kill, just keep living, no matter what.

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