"never live by feelings, just be faithful." That's what My pastor's wife said her dad always used to tell her. it's really good advice but for me it's really hard. We're supposed to live only by God's will. I've been learning about that. And that means basically not paying attention to what I want and what I feel but only God's, and that's what is best for me.
And I mean, look at Jesus! He humbled Himself so much and came here for us. To teach us, to be a servant, to DIE! DO you think He really really WANTED all that pain and non luxury? (I mean yes because He is God and He wanted to save us and help us) But He was paying attention to what the Father had in store for Him and what He had to do. FOR OTHERS. It's very not based on feelings and how one wants to do something. I know for sure I don't always, and don't much live that way, and I need to. Obedience to God and persevering through trials is what will strengthen my faith and grow me. Obedience is what we are commanded to practice and that basically means dieing to self and living in Christ alone. That's hard, but amazing.
The minuet I decided to give it a try and surrender to God - to ask Him for His direction, to give me His will, take mine and give me a whole haerted love for Him - I felt better. Stress was lifted. Life was a little easier. A smile has been on my face and I have time to focus on other people instead of only freaking out. It's a long process and every detail of life isn't insta-fixed, but God is the key - Jesus is the bread of life. Experiance has shown His word to be true and Hid promisses fulfilled. he is a gracious and beautiful Father. It is more than ever imagined - even on earth my Savior never seces to leave me aw struck and on my knees.