L A Z Z Z Y. . .

She wants to deny it. . .

 "No harm is done!" She pleads, innocent with her mouth, but drenched in guilt underneath.

It is true, thing's could be worse, but harm has been done by this absence of action.
Dear girl, let me tell you a story:

Suppose there is a man who hires a first gardener, and to him he says "Gardener, go and garden my large yard. Yes, there are thorns, there is dirt, you will have to lift things, pull things, and dig things,  - no one said it was a piece of cake - but this is what I hired you for.  If you do this, I will be pleased, and you will be rewarded."

So, the first gardener went out and destroyed the man's yard, burning what was already there and adding thorns and weeds that weren't there before.  When the first gardener went to the man to receive his pay, he said "Sir, I really want my reward!" but, the man, obviously, did not give it to him. Instead he said "Gardener, if you truly wanted it, you would have acted accordingly."

After the man fired the first gardener and when his yard was restored to normal, he hired a second gardener. To the second gardener he said the same: "Gardener, go and garden my large yard. Yes, there are thorns, there is dirt, you will have to lift things, pull things, and dig things, - no one said it was a piece of cake - but this is what I hired you for.  If you do this, I will be pleased, and you will be rewarded."

The second gardener went away, and, not wanting the thorns, the dirt, or the work and sweat, he merely sat around. When he went to the man to receive his pay, like the first, it wasn't given to him.

"...but, Sir!" the second gardener pleaded, "I wasn't like the first! No harm was done, and I really want my reward!"

The second gardener was mistaken. Harm was done. True, he did not burn anything down, but in not watering or trimming he let the man's yard turn into it's own kind of disaster.

The man said to the second gardener as he said to the first: "Gardener, if you truly wanted it, you would have acted accordingly."

The man hired yet another gardener, a third saying to him "Gardener, go and garden my large yard. Yes, there are thorns, there is dirt, you will have to lift things, pull things, and dig things, - no one said it was a piece of cake - but this is what I hired you for.  If you do this, I will be pleased, and you will be rewarded."

The third gardener did just what the man requested and tended the garden, pulling things out where they didn't belong and putting things in where they did. At the end of his hard work the third gardener went to receive his pay from the man, and the man rewarded him saying "Well done. You have done what I have asked and now receive blessings."

You, girl, hiding from what you've always known is true, can probably figure out which gardener you are most like. Nothing can be something when it's not where it belongs.

Persevere? Be strong! Get back out there! Quit doing nothing and do what you know is right!

"But for something like that I would need... more confidence," She says, starting a list that she will never finish and turning uncomfortably as if looking for an escape or a way to justify her careless lifestyle.

What you need, dear girl, is a confidence that is this: being sure of what you know is true, what you do, and who you do it for.  You don't even need to be sure of who you are!  That will come in the package. ... You do, however, - and seeming as if you've forgotten or pushed it aside, you need to  now more than ever -  know WHAT you are.

Know what you are, get to know the one you work for a little better, reestablish what you're out here for... Are you doing this whole "life" thing for yourself or who? Confidence will come with that, and hopefully the strength to do a little better. With that will come progress, and the right progress with the right heart will bring reward in a variety of shapes and sizes.

Excuses won't get you anywhere, but we both know who will.

How unworthy do you feel, after this realization, to be offered such an opportunity?

Probably as bad as me. . . ?

(The girl isn't some real person. I'm not being mean. This is somthing I thought about a lot today. writen in an odd way, I admit...  it could have been better.  But you can't deny that the inicial target was a thought provocer.  Think long and hard, friends... long and hard.)

A few thoughts

In life we keep pushing things till tomorrow. We almost always say "yeah I'll do it later", but is later always promised. Millions and millions of people die each day, are all of them saved? How can we as Christians sit back and watch the fireworks and say "well, I can tell my friend about God later", what if your friend isn't there later? We keep waiting until everything goes our way. If we kept on sitting waiting for everything to be exactly perfect, we could be sitting here for a long time. 

One of the worst things people can say is "you're too young". People set an age limit on who can do great things, and who can't, but does God? We need to stop waiting until we are all older and work with the chances that God gives us to let him shine through us. 

Another thing; we get so caught up in church, that we forget about what it's all about. We go to church and we work on making sure that the time fits perfectly and that everything flows smoothly, but when it comes to helping other people and having a real relationship with God, we blow it and forget about it all. Sadly the pastors get caught up in preaching a good sermon, but don't take time to really help the broken man. Why do Christians preach of love, but when it comes down to it, sometimes they just preach but show no actions?

I wish we could all just change for the better...

Tragic American Life

  
            America has been ok but it's the judgement I'm afraid I'll get when I go to school. I'm a tom-boy/ slash girl but I love to get messy and weird! A couple days ago i stepped in mud and a girl was like "Ugh! That is so GROSS! You should get it clean!" And I was like in my head, it's mud. God made dirt, dirt won't hurt! If only she grew up in Africa she would understand! I mean it's not my fault she was stuck in the middle of the World of Plastic! Whatever...
  
              I'm a nerd and I'm proud to call myself one. I'm actually not afraid of what people think. Here in America I get along better with boys 'cause I like video games and comic books and what not. I always try to get into a conversation with a girl about those things but all they care about is make-up and boys. It's so frustrating! One girl was saying she was trying to read Lord of the Rings. and I got into this whole talk about it. A "talk" with myself. She just sat there and looked at me. I know this one girl who is a math wiz and she is in my grade. Then the horrible question came along when I was talking to her. "Well, I like Star Wars, Lord of the Rings, Batman, Hunger Games, X-Men, and so on..." She looked at me and nodded an smile awkwardly.
      
            Anyways, I'm not your average teenage American girl. I'm different and God made me that way. I hope I can find someone as great as you Liz who understands me.
                                                
                                                  I found this quote that applies to this kinda:

            If I'm weird around you,

           It's because I'm comfortable.

~Amber

Touch my brother and I'll break you

This is a little song about how I would stand up for my brother.


You can beat on me and push me around
But if you touch my brother, you’ll be gone before you can hear the sound
This is my last hope, my last wish
You take that away and I’ll make sure you never lived

Try me, but don’t you dare try him
That’s the last mistake you could ever make
We might fight, but he’s my last hope, my last wish
This is my family, you break it, I break you

Come; pick your hands up from your sides
This is the last thing I would ever let slide
Come on; pick those hands up from your sides
Try and run away, I’d like to see you try

I pick him up from the ground
You hurt him and of that you’re proud
Come here; let’s see how tough you are.
Let’s see your pride, when you’re on your knees

Come; pick your hands up from your sides
This is the last thing I would ever let slide
Come on; pick those hands up from your sides
Try and run away, I’d like to see you try


Fear this, because I fear it too
You’ll wish you would have, when I’m done with you
Fear this, because I fear it too
You’ll wish you would have, when I’m done with you

Brother, Be Young

This isn't about me. It's about a girl I know. Poor thing. She is pretty bummed out about life right now. I wrote this poem based on her and from her perspective.
__________________________________________________________

my dear brother, I love and I miss

he doesn't think when he acts, and it hits like a fist

Mother, dear Mother, it's SO unfair

you give me these rules, but let him dye his hair?!

I want him to change, I wish he'd be kind

he's ruined his life, and with that ruined mine

I miss our young days, when we played and were friends

does he think of me now? do those days have an end?

I love him so much, but he's dieing inside

I want him to love me, but he wants to hide

__________________________________________________________

Even though what's going on with her has nothing to do with me, I feel like I have the same feelings as her right now, and I am truly sad with her today. To anyone like me who might have a friend that is really depressed, my advice is plain and simply to point them to Jesus. Sometimes, though, they just need someone to listen.  Just give them an ear - just listen. Let them yell at you. Who else do they have to yell at and get their feelings out to? That is what friends are for.   :)  And Jesus is our best friend. We can always talk to Him as well.

Matthew 11:28 ESV

Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.


Colossians 3:15 NIV
Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful.

My Analogy of Life

Life: We are all vampires craving blood. We look everywhere for it, from under our beds to the end of the rainbow. Sometimes we find what seems to be the real thing, but it's all trash. It's satisfying, but only until it reaches our stomachs, and our stomachs cry "What the heck?! This isn't gonna cut it!"

At the end of the day we return to our houses, disappointed the we just can't seem to find what we want in life. But the next day it's past the shelf in the kitchen and out the door again for another search. The ironic thing is that on that kitchen shelf is a bottomless container of the exact blood we look for day to day. How it can become so overlooked and replaced by garbage is beyond me. It contains the ONLY thing that will satisfy us forever, but we go out believing we will find the same satisfaction at the dump.

Think about it.

My birthday

So about a week ago it was my 16th birthday. Yeah i was kinda excited but i was also really bummed for some reason. I don't know why but this was probably the worst birthday i had the best part though was some of my friends threw me a surprise birthday and it was really fun and nice. But then that really was it, I don't know why but i have been bummed all the time. I don't have any motivation to do anything except play soccer and no one here really cares about sports so it doesn't matter. It seems that i just have really no place in the group of friends here in Malawi anymore. So i am sixteen now and it just keeps getting worse. I have no idea what i should do anymore.